A Married Man in the DMs?

 ^'Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.' Hebrews 13:4

A couple of months ago, one of my girls was approached by a man who she later discovered was married. He was trying to chat her up; persistent, intentional, and completely comfortable hiding the fact that he had a wife at home.

When she told me and showed me the messages, something rose up in me. A holy anger. A deep frustration. A married man?!

Sadly, she isn’t the only one this has happened to. Too many women have found themselves in similar situations, unaware at first, and then shocked when the truth comes out.

So I decided to do something practical.

I drafted a message that any woman can use as a template, something firm, dignified and clear; it was initially for my girl but I realise she isn't the only one that can benefit from it. A response that shuts the door without apology and without drama. You can copy and adapt it for yourself.

Valentine’s Day may have just passed, and emotions can run high during seasons like that. But don’t get swept up in attention that isn’t honourable. The enemy can come disguised as charm, confidence or consistency. An honest man has nothing to hide, especially not a wife.

And ladies, let’s support one another. If your friend shares something questionable, don’t downplay it. Encourage her. Remind her of her worth. Help her respond in a way that reflects wisdom and faith.

We protect what we value. And we do it God’s way.

s,  encourage them the God way! 

Message template:

I noticed when we spoke at the wedding was that you had a wedding ring on. For you to then try to move to me romantically is highly disrespectful to me, to your wife and ultimately to God.

The Bible says marriage is honourable and the bed undefiled, but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. I could have just blocked you but I felt it necessary to give you an opportunity to consider your ways and to repent. What you are doing is a sin and what your actions are implying is sinful.

Just in case you discerned me wrong, I am a believer and follower of Jesus Christ and I honour marriage as God says we should. Even though I’m not yet married, it would be below God’s plan for me to be romantically involved with a married man. Please repent and direct all your romantic attention to your wife. Also if you mistreat your wife, whether she knows or not, your prayers will not be answered. I don’t think you want that. Ultimately if you don’t repent you will go to hell. Jesus Christ didn’t die for your sins for you to make yourself a sinner.

Although you have a choice. Here’s a question.. in case you don’t believe in Jesus Christ.. how would you feel if your daughter in the future came and told you, her husband did to her what you are doing to your wife by hitting on someone else? I reject it for her of course. I pray that’s not her portion. The question was to make you think about your actions.

I hope you get my point and truly think about your actions and repent. You could be a great husband and a great example to your sons, daughters and community. The Holy Spirit convict and lead you to repentance in Jesus name. I will now proceed to blocking you.